Photoshop Fail Of The Week: Katie Maloney Is Full Of Baloney Betches

…And I mean the title in that Katie Maloney is a lying liar who lies. I debated, you guys, I seriously debated choosing this photo for this week’s Photoshop fail, because it’s just not even very interesting. It’s a quick, sloppy edit. It’s not even fun to dissect. But the reason we’re doing it anyway is because I cannot stand idly by. This is about justice. For those of you who don’t know, Katie Maloney-Schwartz, aka Bubba, is often body shamed on Vanderpump Rules. And that is not cool, and nobody should make mean comments about her body. But, it happens time and time again. Katie likes to get caught up on the Justice Train that people should not be bullies …

Why Do People Cheat? A Former Cheater Gives 4 Unexpected Reasons Betches

is nothing if not completely accurate (jokes), and Samantha’s unforgettable “all men cheat” proclamation is no exception. As a tried and true betch, I have no shame in admitting Samantha is my favorite, but I beg to differ on her bold statement circa season 2. According to a study conducted by the Institute for Family Studies, lots of people cheat. Specifically, it found, “Among men who have cheated on their spouse before, 61% are currently married, while 34% are divorced or separated. However, only 44% of women who have cheated before are currently married, while 47% are divorced or separated.” Am I dyslexic or do those numbers say 61% and 44%? ZOINKS! If so, that means that about half of …

The Best ‘Bachelorette Recap Youll Ever Read: Battle Of The Lukes Betches

Bachelorettelast week’s episodebreastfeeding. Then she decided to forgo the one-on-one date entirely in favor of lying in bed sick. Iconic. Finally, in a move that shocked absolutely no one, Hannah sent Cam packing at the rose ceremony. Apparently she didn’t love his retelling of when she asked him to tell her a little bit more about himself. Sad! some yard timeThey’ll be going to Newport, Rhode Island, and they act as if Chris just told them they won an all-inclusive trip to Croatia for Yacht Week. Sighs. Jed’s One-on-One Date: Hannah begins the date by absolutely butchering American history. She’s like “no taxation without representation…maybe. Idk. I saw it on a bumper sticker once!” Jesus Christ. I guess that’s just …

Problematic YouTube Stars Who Are Even Worse Than James Charles Betches

In the last few weeks, YouTube drama has been in the news like never before. You might not have known about James Charles or Tati before, but now you probably have a deep understanding of their feud and who betrayed whom and which receipts might have been fake. Okay, maybe “deep understanding” is an overstatement, but we’ve talked through the drama. But if you’re new to the world of YouTube personalities, there’s a lifetime of drama for you to catch up on. It would be literally impossible to explain all the dynamics of the various YouTube communities, but there are obviously a handful of people who rise to the top and dominate. And what do you know, the majority of …

I’m A Stripper, And I’m Tired Of Hearing These Misconceptions About My Job Betches

The first time I ever set foot in a strip club, I was in awe. I mean, the club was sh*t and the drinks were overpriced, but the strippers were A-MAZ-ING. I pulled a T-pain and fell in love with all of them. Of course, being a fan of strippers isn’t groundbreaking. Most people are pretty pumped about a topless woman showing off her athletic abilities. However, most people have a lot of inaccurate ideas about strippers. The way strippers are portrayed in media and the ways in which we talk about them in casual conversation are usually based on false stereotypes. Wow, humans wildly misrepresenting an entire group of people based on assumptions and a desire to belittle that …

Scott Disick Doesn’t Have A Wikipedia Page So We Wrote Him One Betches

Okay, so it’s been brought to my attention that for some godforsaken reason, Scott Disick doesn’t have a Wikipedia page. Even Rob Kardashian has one, and he’s best known for…um, selling socks. How can one of the best characters on KUWTK and the most salacious riotmaker of the tabloids not have a Wikipedia page? Since Wikipedia helped us graduate high school (and, let’s be honest, college), we decided to do them a solid and make a page for Scott. Check out the SparkNotes version of Scott Disick’s life (with some opinions thrown in, obvi). “Career” Reality Star Let’s not act like Kourtney was involved with Scott for so long because she was in love with him. I mean, he got …

5 Things Men Need To Stop Doing In Bed Betches

Ever since I was old enough to subscribe to women’s magazines, I have had mixed feelings about them. While I am a believer in self-improvement, the barrage of articles telling me I should change or improve some aspect of myself made me feel inadequate. Never was this feeling more acute than after reading the sex tips offered by these magazines. I thought I was doing just fine in this area and had never received a bad review, but if these magazines were to be believed, I would need to stand on my head and breathe through my nose while blindfolded in order to really impress in the bedroom. I’m all for keeping things exciting, especially in the context of a …

Does Liking Vanilla Sex Make You Bad In Bed? Betches

These are words that come out of my best girlfriend’s mouth and I try not to act absolutely horrified. It’s a typical girl’s night for my crew, so we’re getting completely wrecked over $8 bottles of Trader Joe’s wine and lamenting over the sh*tty men life has dealt us. My story for the evening was going to consist of “and then he refused to go down on me, can you believe it?!” I was going to be equal parts angry and indignant. There would be a lot of angry huffing and even more drinking. Or maybe I would talk about the guy I dated before this guy, whose idea of foreplay consisted of three minutes of finger banging and some …

The Best Celebrity Mother’s Day Posts Betches

Like any other holiday in 2019, Mother’s Day is 25% about what you’re doing in real life, and 75% about what you post on social media. Maybe you took your mom out to a nice brunch, or at least gave a her a nice phone call, but I’m willing to bet that no matter what, but either way you definitely posted 47 photos of her on your Instagram story, despite the fact that she couldn’t figure out how to use Instagram if her life depended on it. Celebrities are no different than us when it comes to holidays on the internet, and nearly every famous person who is/has a mom posted something to mark Mother’s Day. Obviously, all moms are …

Charli XCX And Lizzo Just Released A Summer Anthem Betches

If you read any of my music columns in the past (it’s okay, nobody did), then you’d know that, typically, most new singles get released on Fridays. I don’t know why; my friend who works in music PR told me it used to be Tuesdays and then for some reason they changed it to Fridays. That is way more annoying for me, but the plus side is that we get to go into the weekend every weekend with new bangers. Anyway, it doesn’t matter, because today (Wednesday) we are getting a new single from Charli XCX featuring Lizzo. It’s called “Blame It On Your Love”, and it is an anthem. Praise be. Friday has come early this week. Charli XCX’s …