Did you know that approximately 15% of all enlisted personnel in the United States armed forces are women? Perhaps that changes your preconceived notions about what a soldier is; maybe it doesn’t. Either way, there are enough enlisted women to make it worthwhile to know some things about dating them.
Dating service women comes with certain challenges that don’t really come into play when dating women that aren’t in the military. She will have duty obligations that she won’t be able to get out of, and she doesn’t always have much advanced warning of when such things will come up. This could range from an unexpected assignment to being called to serve in a war zone. In effect, their every move can be dictated by their chain of command. Needless to say, it takes the right kind of guy to date a woman in the military (and the reverse is true for women dating men in the military).
You not only have to be able to do all of the things in the romance department that go along with dating, you also need to be ready for abrupt changes. At the same time, you need to be very understanding of any special circumstances that may go along with her career. For example, depending on her position, she may not be able to talk to you all that much about what she does. Keep in mind that this isn’t a personal slight against you, but rather a security issue.
Other than that, dating service women is the same as dating other women. They are still women, and a uniform doesn’t change that. The same basic rules apply: Be honest, be yourself and treat her with respect. The need to do these simple things is always there, no matter what the woman you are dating happens to do for a living.
That being said, you also need to take not of how she likes to be treated. Most women in the military try to act like “one of the boys” when they are at work. Some of them just have this as their natural personality and will appreciate being treated that way when you’re dating them. However, some of them can’t wait to let their feminine shine through as soon as they are done for the day. If this is the case, then you need to take that to heart and be sure to treat her like the lady she is.
Finally, don’t treat her like some sort of special prize that you can show off to her friends. Just because she’s in the military doesn’t mean she is some sort of novelty. If that is your attitude, then it’s best to move on; it’s not healthy. Assuming you are interested in dating service women for the right reasons…go ahead! They are, first and foremost, women and deserve to be treated as well as any other women you have dated.